How do I Survive the Never Ending to-do List?

Humour me for a minute. Let’s start with a glimpse into my average day:

  • 6.00am – Kiss Scott goodbye and spend time with God (reading / studying / praying / worshipping)
  • 6:30am – Get myself and the boys ready for school
  • 7:30am – Stop to read a book/colour in/draw/play animals/smell the roses
  • 7:50am – Drive to school
  • 8:10am – Kiss my boys goodbye, walk to the school office, put my things at my desk.      Take a deep breath. Steel myself for the day ahead.
  • 8:15am – Walk to Staff Devotions
  • 8:30am – Cuppa Tea (nothing fancy, just boring ol’ English Breakfast)

For the next 7.6 (or sometimes 10) hours it is often a whirlwind of checking the time, making sure the Boss Lady has what she needs for her next meeting, ensuring she is not going over time, chatting to whoever is sitting in my office waiting for the next appointment, preparing for upcoming meetings and events, talking through issues with other staff, caring for those within our school community, keeping staff up to date with changes, supporting our Board of Directors and the many many many many many administrative tasks that come with being an Executive Assistant. The list is endless. 

I leave work some days thinking ‘what did I actually achieve today?’ From the to-do list in my inbox, to the one in my Outlook tasks, to the post it notes on my desk, to the list in OneNote, how much did I actually get through? From 16 years of admin experience I know how to manage my time well, yet it’s the unknowns that are thrown our way that can easily cause us to feel like we’re crumbling. Like we aren’t achieving enough. Like we are only as worthwhile as the number of things we have ticked off our to-do list. And if we haven’t ticked off enough, what’s the point of bothering to try again tomorrow? Is this resonating with anyone? Hopefully I’m not alone in this. 

Then there’s the short drive home to more chaos than I found at work: playing, wrestling, laughing, screaming, crying (and that’s just my husband). Everyday we encounter all of the above. I can assure you I know how much of a blessing it is to come home to a house filled with noise and laughter and love. I know that not everyone has been blessed in this same way and it’s not a gift I take lightly. But it does mean that after a quick kiss hello, I disappear to my room for 5 minutes to switch brains. To take another deep breath. To steel myself for the evening ahead. (Then go back out and take part in the said-playing, wrestling, laughing, screaming and crying). Who knows where the night will take us.

Some days seem like an endless cycle of crazy.

And then there’s the issues that come with being so connected: answering phone calls, voicemails, emails, texts, instant messaging at work, keeping up to date with social media comments, likes or tags, the list can be endless. That’s not even taking into consideration the amount of time we stalk others online. Come on, don’t be shy, you know we all do it.

Oh and then there’s the life admin too! Bills to pay, appointments to schedule, houses that won’t clean themselves, gardens that never stop growing, renovations or repairs that take time and effort. A social life? Date nights? When are we meant to squeeze them in? Time with God? How and when is that supposed to fit into this crazy?

My average day that I’ve described above is now joyful chaos for me. Over the past few years I’ve made intentional changes to ensure there is time, energy, positive mental and spiritual health in order to thrive, not just survive (and struggle) through life.

Here are some of the things I find are helpful, my prayer is that these simple tips may help you too:

Remember who you are and whose you are.

Psalm 139 is a perfect place to start. It will show you countless truths about God’s omnipotence and omnipresence and it will show you that despite the enormity of God, he loves and knows you so intimately. So personally. So much more than anyone else ever could.

Maintain perspective.

On the top of my screen at work I have these words blu-tacked: “MAINTAIN PERSPECTIVE.” It keeps me focused and grounded when I’m feeling overwhelmed, run off my feet, like I’m out of control and unable to make any progress or change around me. It keeps me coming back to why I do what I do, the fact that I love what I do, that I’m grateful to have a satisfying and fulfilling job, a supportive working environment, two beautiful-hearted sons that I get to sow into on a daily basis, a supportive husband who will listen to me adnausem about my day and life in general, a beautiful extended family and solid friendships who continuously remind me about the importance of #3.

Maintain a Kingdom perspective.

I keep reminding myself that this world is temporary. If I’ve printed something in the wrong font or size, my Boss Lady is often saying “it won’t matter for eternity.” I love this. We have a culture of striving for excellence where I work, but at times we need to all remind ourselves that God is God. That His Kingdom is eternal. It is unchanging. It is perfect. And that God is always in control and is always faithful.

Smell the roses.

(Isolation, right? Funnily enough I wrote this right before COVID-19 so I assume you’ve all been doing this). Take time out. Take small chunks of time if that’s all you can afford. Become child-like in life at times to get the most joy out of it. Be the crazy Aunty on the jumping castle, be the mum who draws with chalk on your driveway or waltzes with your son in the middle of the park. 

Be present.

Rick Warren said “When you give someone your time, you are giving them a portion of your life that you’ll never get back…it is not enough to just say relationships are important; we must prove it by investing time in them.” (Purpose Driven Life: What on Earth Am I Here For?) 

Sidenote: I wrote this months ago and nearly posted it on Wednesday but it didn’t feel right. I always pray for God’s timing and this morning I know why. I was meant to add this paragraph. I’m reading through “Chronological Tour through the Bible,” by Ron Rhodes this year, And this was part of this morning’s reading: “Teach us the brevity of life, so that we may grow in wisdom, Psalm 90:12. This reminds us Of Psalm 39:4, Lord, remind me how brief my time on earth will be. Remind me that my days are numbered-how fleeting my life is. It is wise to be cognisant of one’s mortality.” Whether you’re wanting to invest in relationship with other people or with God, they are both in need of your commitment of time if you want them to grow. We need to be wise with how we spend it.

Be clear with your boundaries.

As we’ve just seen your time can be your greatest blessing to another, but it is a precious resource. But it’s important to guard your life and your heart from those people or hobbies or activities that want to suck it all up. Choose how you spend your time wisely.

Rest.

There is one thing I have learnt to do well. REST. To take time for myself, doing something I love. It often looks different. Some days it’s watching TV, reading a book, listening to a podcast, writing, watching a movie with my children or a new hobby: puzzles, although I’m pretty terrible at them. Other days it’s lying in our hammock in the peace and quiet with the family locked inside. (They’re all safe, don’t panic).

And I’m saving my favourite and my most treasured tip for last. It goes beyond the short glimpses of rest that we try to squeeze in among the chaos. There are moments when the stress of busyness builds up and for me it’s at least a few times a year where…

I block out an entire day to spend with God.

I started doing this about 5 years ago. It’s about resetting, recentering and refocusing. It’s a way of resetting your body, recentering your soul and refocusing your mind (more on this later). Reading God’s Word, journaling, writing, worshipping, singing, dancing, responding to God however I feel led to. He is the only one who can truly give me the strength to keep going. Time with God needs to be a priority.

When you try and squeeze God in as one priority among many others, it only leads to frustration instead of beauty, appreciation and blessing.

Remembering that He himself rested when he created the world. Lean into that and ask him to restore your mind, body and soul. There is no life quite like living with God as our ultimate rest. 

Exodus 14:14 is one of my favourite verses: “The Lord will fight for you, you need only to be still.”

What do you do to break through the busyness? Or to rest well? I’d love to hear your thoughts and what works for you, leave your comments below.

BB

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